One Weird and Wacky Week
by The Disappeared
Summary: Ginny and Draco were mortal enemies. Always had been, and presumably, always would be. But when gods get involved, chaos results, and anything can happen. A great DG fic. The first chapter isn't that good, but it gets better as you go! R&R! ON HOLD.
1. Chapter 1

Ginny and Draco were mortal enemies. Their friends were enemies, their families were enemies, so, naturally, they were too. They took it for granted that they would always loathe each other – that is, until one weird and wacky event changed everything.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Nothing. Nada, zip, zilch.

Ginny walked down the hall briskly, smiling broadly at everything and everyone in her path and looking like an utter lunatic. She had heard from Hermione once that smiling released endorphins (A/N – chemicals or hormones or something that makes you feel happy), and since she was feeling miserable right now, she could use all the happiness she could get. Ginny actually hadn't had that bad a day, but she felt miserable because she was immensely bored. B-O-R-E-D. Same thing day in, and day out. Same schedule, same people, same place, same food. There must be something better out there!

Ginny was so wrapped up in her misery that she missed the fact that she was about to go down a staircase, and nearly lost her footing. A group of first-year Ravenclaw girls brushed by her, knocking her rudely to the side.

"They have the hearts of Slytherins," Ginny thought.

Ginny looked down at the floor glumly, watching people's feet move by. She noticed scorch marks on the floor. They made her think of the time that Hagrid had tried to raise a baby dragon that he had named Norbert. Oh, Hagrid – with him it was one deadly dangerous illegal animal after another.

A little Gryffindor girl stood huddled by the wall of the staircase landing, sneezing up a storm. All the other students flowed past her, leaving plenty of distance between the girl and themselves. All Ginny could assume was that they were afraid of germs or something. Out of pity, Ginny headed towards her.

"Would you like a hanky or something? I can take you to the hospital wing if you need to go there?" Ginny offered kindly.

"ACHOO! No – ACHOO! Get away – ACHOO! – from me," the girl cried, shooing Ginny away.

Ginny was about to retort huffily when she realized that each time the girl sneezed, a small flicker of flame shot out. She was about to back away, when another student behind her began to sneeze as well. Ginny froze, trying to avoid the cross-fire, but was unable to completely leave. Instead, she settled for huddling on the ground, hands covering her head. What Ginny failed to realize was that when you sneeze – you aim down.

Consequently, when the little Gryffindor sneezed her largest sneeze yet, a sizable fireball shot past Ginny's head. The very edge of one of her braids caught on fire, and a nasty stench filled the air.

"Oh!" Ginny half-shouted, not knowing what to do. Finally she dumped her Bubbling Blueberry soda over her head. Luckily there wasn't much damage to her hair, because of her (semi) quick thinking. (Hermione must have been rubbing off on her.)

"Miss Warrington!" Professor McGonagall cried, swooping down on the sneezing students. She quickly took in the problem, and transfigured her pencils into two goblets of water, and directly both students to sneeze directly into them. "What has come over you two! Come, I'll escort you both to the clinic."

"Ummm…Professor?" Ginny put in, questioning meekly. "What about me?"

Professor McGonagall appraised Ginny swiftly, taking in her dripping blue head and the scorch marks on her robes. (A/N – Does anyone know why it's robes if it's a singular term? Sorry, I'm just a grammar freak (read my bio))

"Go to the lavatory and clean up. I'm sure your professor will understand." And, with that, she swept the fire-breathing girl away.

"Professor! I have Snape next!" Ginny called helplessly after McGonagall.

"Oh, great, just my luck," Ginny muttered en-route the way to the bathroom. She was on the second floor, and would be late anyways, so if she had to face Snape's wrath anyway, at least she would be clean at her burial. It took her about three minutes worth of rinsing to fully remove the soda from her hair.

Critically examining herself in the mirror, Ginny realized she had dark splotches all over her robes where she had splashed water on herself in an attempt to remove the sticky soda.

"Ah, well," Ginny thought airily. "It'll be dry once I get there."

She plodded down the stairs slowly…in no rush to get to class. Unfortunately, even if you go at the speed of an old lady lugging her oxygen around, eventually, stairs have to run out. Ginny took a deep breath, and then opened the door.

"And so, verituserum –" Snape was saying as she came in, but cut himself off to yell at Ginny. "Miss. Weasley! You are exactly ten minutes late to my class!" Snape said.

"I'm sorry professor, but a little girl was sneezing fire balls and Professor McGonagall said you'd understand and –"

"Silence!" Snape roared. "Sixty points from Gryffindor!"

"Sixty points!" Ginny protested, knowing it was to no avail. She strode angrily towards her desk, ignoring the glares from the Gryffindors and the smirks from the Slytherins.

"Now, as I was saying," Snape began. "Verituserum is a potion capable of making anyone answer questions truthfully; however it can only be administered when the recipient is knocked out or otherwise unprepared for it. If the recipient knows what you are doing, then they could pretend to drink it and then act as if they are under the potion's influence. So today will shall be making it and then testing it. I will do an example for you. Miss. Weasley," Snape snarled. "Come up here."

Ginny, just sitting down, stood up again and walked up to the front of the class. Her fingers clenched and unclenched in her robes, knowing that whatever happened was not going to be pretty.

"As I said before, the person might cheat, so in this case we will simply take away 150 points if we catch her cheating, and ask her hard to evade questions." Snape said, spurring mass peer pressure from the Gryffindors in the room.

Snape held up the vial of verituserum, and then he dropped it on the ground. It smashed to pieces at his feet, but oddly enough, the professor ignored it.

He clambered up on to his desk, and shouted, "Howdy, ya'll!" The Gryffindors giggled nervously, while the Slytherins sat dumbfounded.

"My name's rightly Bob Hickam," Snape shouted with a thick southern accent. "An' I wanta introduce ya'll to Mr. Smith." He pulled up his robes smiling, as he showed his sickeningly white legs.

He hiked his robes up around his waist, and revealed his boxers. But these were no ordinary boxers, no, no. They were bright pink and were dotted when purple and red hearts that, upon further examination, read _I love McGonagall_.

"Ya'll," Snape shouted amidst titters, as the students had figured out that the professor was not himself. "Ya'll," he repeated, "meet Mr. Smith. My most favoritest pair of boxers. I wear 'em every day, an' never wash 'em, 'cause Mr. Smith don't like no washin'."

The students groaned in disgust simultaneously. Snape seemed to return to himself again. He gaped at the class, slackjawed. Then he looked down at himself, stunned. He quickly dropped his robes (to Ginny's great relief - his legs were grossing her out) and hopped down off of the desk.

"That never happened," Snape managed to say. "Never, you hear me! NEVER!" he shouted, his voice reaching a demonic crescendo. "If I hear one word about this, I swear, I will track that student down and they will wish they were dead. Now, out! Out of my classroom!" he howled crazily at the stunned students. "OUT!" he bellowed, as students tripped over each other to escape.

Ginny left, too. She had an Herbology assignment she needed to do before next class and an insane teacher with nauseating white legs to escape. One thing was for sure. That was a story to pass down to her grandchildren!

So? Good story! Come on you know you want to say yes and then hit the pretty purple button down there to REVIEW! I will keep writing this story, because this is **NOT** a one-shot. Sorry if it's a bit fast, paced, but it'll get better! I promise!


	2. Chapter 2

Thank you for the 6 reviews (I know it's eight, but one's my mother's and one is mine so I didn't count them)! I'm very pleased, my last story didn't get nearly that many the first chapter. Yay! Personally, I think this is a pretty good chapter for me. (I went slowly! – relatively) Sorry it took so long to update – and unfortunately it'll probably take even longer next time. Although, I have been inspired, so you never know. PLEASE REVIEW! (It does wonders for my self esteem)

**Disclaimer: **This is not mine. Otherwise I would be filthy rich, and would be working on the 7th Harry Potter right now.

"Come this way." A voice called out to Ginny in her dream. "Follow me…I have something important to tell you. This way...this way!" the voice called in a sing-song manner.

"Come on, you're almost there. We're going to be late!" the voice cried.

"Late for what?" the dream Ginny asked.

"For our meeting of course!" The voice said, echoing in the clouds that were the backdrop of her dream.

Ginny looked down and saw that she was up many miles from the ground…so far that she couldn't even see it! The place she was at felt like…like the muggle heaven.

"No silly, this isn't heaven!" the voice called. "It's the dream world in the realm of the gods! Not many mortals get to see this you know."

The dream Ginny seemed relatively unperturbed by the fact that she was in the realm of the gods AND whoever was talking could read minds. She simply nodded mutely.

"This way!" The voice called when Ginny went on a path it didn't wish her to follow. "Head towards my voice."

Ginny followed, weaving and swaying as she tried to follow the melodious voice. Suddenly the cloud beneath her became insubstantial, and Ginny dropped towards the earth. She fell and fell and fell for miles in what seemed like a blink of an eye.

Ginny gasped softly, looking around at her surroundings. She was back in her real body, but it still felt like a dream. She was in the restricted section of the library, surrounded by old musty books which were written who knew how long ago. But the reason that it felt like a dream lay not in the fact that she was in the library, instead of in her warm cozy bed, but in the fact that a glowing, chubby figure sat cross-legged, floating in front of her.

He had a mop of curly golden curls covering his round head, and wore a pinkish-red tunic and tights with a fringe of pink and white ribbons on the ends. In the center of his shirt lay a huge pale pink heart lined with delicately made lace. The figure smiled, revealing childish dimples that also dotted his elbows and knees, like baby fat. A miniature quiver full of arrows with hearts instead of feathers on the end.

Ginny took a step away from the little man, or child…whatever he was, and made a move as if to run.

"Ginny! Wait!" The figure cried in the exact same voice that she had heard earlier in her dream.

"Allow me to explain myself. I am a god from Mount Olympus, and I'm here to help you. I was the person that guided you in your dream, and led your sleepwalking body to where it is now. I mean you no harm, truly."

"Why did you bring me here? And who exactly are you, anyway." Ginny asked warily, bringing her wand to rest behind her back, where she could use it if the little man…god, or whatever he was, got out of hand.

"Did you not hear me in your dream?" the god asked, his voice tinged with lightly masked irritation. "I wanted to meet with you. As for who I am, surely you can guess that much."

"Cupid." Ginny said steadily. "You're Cupid aren't you."

"But of course!" Cupid cried merrily. "What other god would dare to wear an outfit so girly? Psyche made it, and I didn't want her to feel unhappy. Besides, she makes the BEST ambrosia in all of Olympus, and I knew she wouldn't give me any for a whole decade if I told her what I truly thought of it."

"Psyche is your wife, right?" Ginny asked.

"Yes she is. I'm afraid I overindulge on her cooking though," Cupid said, fingering his ample stomach ruefully.

"So what did you want to meet with me about?" Ginny asked, relaxing slightly. Cupid reminded her of one of her favorite great-uncles with his silly antics, and it was impossible to be afraid of him.

"Ah, to business already?" Cupid asked. "I'm afraid we'll have to wait just one teensy second more though. He should be here any minute now."

"He? He, who?"

"Why, your partner of course. I'll explain everything when he gets here."

She waited, wary once more. Presently there came the sound of feet scuffling slowly across the floor. Filch!

"Ah, here he comes now." Cupid said.

"Filch!" Ginny exclaimed softly, for fear of being heard. "Filch is my partner!"

"Of course not. Poor man, Filch. I, er, accidentally shot him with one of my arrows once, and the first thing he saw was a cat. He's never been the same since."

Ginny muffled a giggle at this, and made a mental note to tell her friends the story Filch's creation.

"Don't worry my dear, I've accounted for everything." Cupid said distractedly, his mind clearly on other matters. Suddenly a crash came, and a yell.

"Except for that." Cupid said, rushing to the source of the noise. Ginny followed, giggling.

A cart full of library books lay turned on its side and someone underneath struggled to free himself.

"Here, let me help you." Ginny said, still chuckling.

"Thanks," said the trapped boy, grabbing her outstretched hand. As he pulled himself out of the wreckage Ginny saw at once who it was.

"Malfoy!"

"Weasley!"

"Malfoy is my partner!"

Bum bum bum buuuuuuuuuuuum! Cliffie! Don't worry, I will write more, so this is only temporary. (unlike those where people just stop writing – augh!) I am very inspired for the next chapter, so it's only a matter of when I have time to write it. Pleeeeeeease review. The more reviews I get, the faster I'll update! ('cause I'll associate happy thoughts with my fanfic story – yay!)


	3. Chapter 3

UPDATE: Freshly edited this chapter as of August 2nd,so ithopefully doesn't suck as much as it did the first time around!

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"What the…" Malfoy asked, now very confused. "Okay, before my wand comes out, somebody had better explain what the heck is going on here. Starting with who this floating fat guy is, what I'm doing here, and what Weasley is blathering about."

"I, thank you very much, am a god. Cupid, in fact," said god informed Malfoy, a bit put out. "Floating fat guy, indeed."

"Somehow I'd pictured you to be a bit more…god-like," Malfoy said, not concerned about angering a god in the least.

"Anyways," Cupid said, ignoring Malfoy's barb, "I lead both yourself and Miss Weasley here through a dream to help me deal with a big problem at Hogwarts. You've probably noticed it – strange things happening with no recognizable cause…"

"Like the little Hufflepuff spewing flames without anyone cursing her?" Ginny asked, finally figuring it out.

"Yes!" Cupid cried, pleased that she understood. "You see, I was making a love potion for those two oblivious Gryffindors, Ron and Hermione, you know, to speed things up a little, but I may have messed up a little. There was another recipe underneath the one for love potions, and I sort of, um… got the two mixed up a bit. Anyway, you've seen the results. Chaos."

"I'll say," Draco interrupted. "Snape, with a country accent and boxers named Bob! That takes an awful lot of chaos."

"Anyways, I have the recipe for a potion to counter it, however, I'm an ethereal being, so that kind of makes things difficult."

"Ethereal?" Ginny asked.

"Basically it means that I'm insubstantial. Kind of like a ghost," Cupid replied.

"Ah…" Ginny said, understanding now.

"Yeah, you see my problem. I normally use Aphrodite's lounge, as I'm a physical being in there, but she just got herself a new boyfriend – Ares, 'god of war.' He's a wimp AND a jerk, but all pretty Aphro cares about is his looks. Sheesh. Anyway, she's locked the door, and I can't get in. Even if I could get in, I wouldn't want to, 'cause I SO don't want to see what they're doing back there. Blech. So, you'll have to make the potion for me."

"Why choose Malfoy and me as partners, of all people?" Ginny asked. "We're enemies, in case you hadn't noticed."

"Well, all I knew at the time was that both of you are smart and capable, and if you say you're enemies, that simply means you'll have different skills. Ginny, your gifts with spells and self defense in general will help to keep both of you out of harm's way, and Draco excels at brewing potions. I would simply have chosen Hermione, who is good at everything except astrology, but I would have to have paired her with someone else for safety's sake. That might mess up her relationship with Ron, thereby defeating the whole purpose of the original potion. Anyway, here's the recipe for the antidote. Take notes now, I might not get it right the second time." Cupid instructed. The partners scrabbled for a quill and some parchment as Cupid waited patiently.

"Ready? Okay then. You need –

Three unicorn hairs

The ashes of a male phoenix

Giant drool

Five cups of mashed burping berries

Three snare-tree leaves

Stir counter-clockwise for exactly thirteen minutes, and then give it to me. I'll dip my arrow in it, and fix this whole mess before you can say love-potion."

"Good." Ginny said. "Snape has already traumatized me enough. I don't know if I could have taken any more chaotic events."

"Oh, and one more thing. You won't be safe from the chaos, in or out of the school. I'd expect at least one chaotic thing to happen to both of you daily, if not more." Cupid said, amid the children's groans. Blowing a kiss to Ginny, Cupid bowed dramatically and disappeared, leaving a burst of hearts in his wake.

An awkward silence rose as the last of the hearts faded. The two glared at each other, as it would set a bad precedent if they didn't act as enemies. Finally, Ginny became the first to break eye contact.

Malfoy gave a condescending snort at Ginny's ineptitude, and broke the silence.

"Say, Weasley, you aren't actually going to do what the fat midget told you to, are you?" he asked mockingly.

"Well, why not? Aren't you?" Ginny questioned.

"Of course not!" Malfoy scoffed. "Now, I don't know what he's trying to accomplish by feeding us that tall tale, but I assure you, I am not going to fall for it. Besides, even if something were going on, it would be much too degrading to work with a Weasley."

Ginny flushed hotly at this, but continued as if nothing was wrong. "And what about Snape? Surely you can't just dismiss that as a common occurrence!"

"A rumor only." Malfoy dismissed.

"So…so that's it then. Nothing happened, and I can't change your mind."

"That's right, Weaslette," Malfoy said, sprawling out onto a bench lazily.

"Well, fine then. I'll just have to do it on my own!" Ginny cried.

"You? You couldn't brew a potion if you tried."

"Well, at least I'm going to try, instead of being a spineless git like you!"

"I'm no coward," Malfoy said, his voice hardening. "I'm just too cunning to have a trick like that pulled over my head. You, on the other hand, are much too stupid, and are just going to go charging in on a problem that you know nothing about. A heroic thought, Weasley, but one that will get you killed. Then again, since I care nothing for your life, go right ahead. I'll stay right here, and will point and laugh when you fail."

"I won't fail!" Ginny said, practically yelling at this point. "You'll see!"

Malfoy granted that with only a bemused glance, and then walked away, presumably back to his bed. Ginny stalked away.

"Stupid Malfoy," she muttered under her breath. "I'll have to drag him along. If I can't convince him, then maybe Harry will go with me. No," she said, after a moment's thought. "Harry's absolutely horrid at potions. In fact, only Slytherins have a knack for them. I guess I'll recruit one of them instead. An easily intimidated first year will do. Easily intimidated! Who am I kidding? Slytherins aren't intimidated by anything. One thing's for sure, though. It's up to me to fix this mess now."

* * *

Sorry about the ending, they aren't my finer points. I've revised the first chapter a ton, so hopefully it sucks a ton less than it did the first time around. Thanks to all of my reviewers for being patient with my high-speed story. I'm TRYING to move more slowly in the plot, but I'm not a naturally patient person, so I apologize for anything that goes too fast. On a happier note, finals are over, I have "A" averages for both classes that were only a semester long, and I now have time to write more since it's Christmas break. So, the next chapter SHOULD be up soon, but I can't guarantee anything because Word has been acting up and being EVIL! Grrrrrrr….. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! Pretty pleeeease? Just hit the purple button and tell me if you like it or not. Thanks! 


	4. Chapter 4

Ginny blinked her eyes blearily at her alarm clock, unable to shut its incessant cries out of her head.

"Come on, girl, get up now," the clock said crossly. "I want to go back to bed. It's a half an hour before I normally wake you, but you insisted on this ghastly hour last night. Well, here I am, awake and doing my job, and what thanks do I get? I've been trying to wake you for five minutes now!"

"Why would I ask you to wake me up now?" Ginny asked groggily.

"How would I know! You never tell me anything! I think you mentioned something about research though. Why you'd want to do that, I don't know, but what I do know is that I'm going to get a hoarse throat if I have to keep yelling at you to GET UP!" the clock screeched.

Ginny reached under her pillow and pulled out a mallet.

"Oh, no. Not the mallet. Please, not the mallet!" the alarm clock pleaded.

She raised the mallet above the clock, and then brought it down to lightly rap it on the off button.

"Phew," said the clock, as its voice faded away.

Ginny stretched out in her bed, and wiped the sleep from her eyes. She propped herself up with her elbows and kicked her fluffy comforter off. Immediately she regretted doing so, because it was extremely cold inside the drafty tower. Shivering slightly, she climbed out of bed, and shuffled towards her clothes. She tossed her pajamas on the bed and pulled on her robes. They, like everything else, were cold.

Ginny reached into her pocket and pulled out her wand.

"Calefacto," she muttered, pointing her wand at her robes. Orange sparks shot out, and her robes grew warm.

"Much better," Ginny said, sighing happily.

She moved towards the bathroom with caution, moving around her dorm mates that had, astonishingly, remained asleep despite the alarm clock's tirade. She splashed her face with cold water, and brushed her teeth. Then she headed down to the library.

It was common knowledge that Madam Pince was always in the library before opening hours, and, if Ginny played her cards right, she could go in and try to make sense of last night's dream. Or, rather, not a dream but a very strange reality. She'd brought the list of ingredients that Cupid had given her for the potion, but Ginny was still unsure on how to get them. Mashed burping berries were fairly common, but the rest were very rare and certainly never used for potions.

Unicorn hairs were used often in wands, but the hairs had to have already been shed, as unicorns were endangered species. The few that were collected were limited strictly to wands, and carefully guarded, so that was out of the question. She could probably get some phoenix ashes from Fawkes, but the rest she'd have to either get from Snape's own ingredients (kept under lock and key) or research where to get them.

"Madam Pince?" Ginny called, rapping on the library door.

"Madam Pince?" Ginny called again when there was no immediate response. "Please let me in, it's important."

By peering into the library through a small window, Ginny could make out Madam Pince walking swiftly towards the doors, robes billowing behind her.

"What is it?" the librarian snapped waspishly. "This library isn't open for another fifteen minutes, yet." Her angry eyes came to rest on Ginny and softened slightly.

"Oh, it's only you, Ginny. What do you need?" she asked.

"Well, Madam, I had this fantastic dream last night about a knight and his adventures, and it gave me a great idea for a short story! But, I'm afraid I didn't pay close enough attention in Professor Binns class, and I don't recall enough about medieval wizarding Europe to write it," Ginny admitted sheepishly. "I'd really like to be able to get most of the story written before I lose it, but I'd have to refresh my memory of medieval Europe first," she explained, as Madam Pince nodded knowingly. "Would you mind terribly if I came in and did some quick research?"

The librarian granted her permission, as Ginny had known she would. She followed Madam Pince into the library, listening patiently as she recommended book after book on the subject. When she finally let Ginny out of the library, she had given her five large tomes on the subject of medieval Europe, and more information on knights than she could ever want. Unbeknownst to Madam Pince, Ginny had also managed to slip _Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them_, and an herbology book into the pile.

Ginny followed the throng of sleepwalking students down to the Great Hall for breakfast, using her books as a battering ram. Entering the Great Hall, she made her way towards the Gryffindor table. Ginny plopped down on a bench, scattering her books everywhere.

"Why, Ginny!" Hermione exclaimed, picking up the books and reading their titles. "I didn't know you were so interested in medieval history! And herbology…and magical creatures…" Hermione said, her enthusiasm replaced with suspicion. "All right, Ginny. What are you up to this time?"

"Nothing!" Ginny said cheekily. "I'm just …umm…studying for my mid-terms!"

"Hate to break it to you, Ginny, but mid-terms were last week," Harry said, grinning. "Now what are you really up to?"

"I can't tell you right now," she said apologetically. "But I'll tell you later, I promise!"

"As long as it doesn't involve boys, I don't care," Ron mumbled through a mouthful of cornflakes.

"You caught me! I've secretly been dating Malfoy for weeks now, and he just totally goes for the school girl look." Ginny said, mock-dramatically.

Ron just gave her a glare and went back to shoveling cereal in his mouth.

Now that the attention was diverted off of her "studying," Ginny began flipping through the pages of _Dangerous Plants of the Wizarding World._

"Hmmmm…ravenous bushes…renewing weeds…salivating flowers…snare-trees!" Ginny muttered under her breath.

_Mistakenly named snare-trees by Bumbelous Watterson during the great expedition of 1859, snare trees are actually vines. They were erroneously named trees because the vines actually hook onto the trees, and for all appearances, are part of the tree. The vine actually begins deep in the ground, and then works its way up into the roots and into the heart of the host tree. It then breaks through the bark on the tree's branches and once out in the open it grows down to the forest floor. There it weaves traps for its unsuspecting prey. As soon as a creature steps into the trap, it is ensnared, thus the name. In a single day the snare tree digests its prey – alive. This can be accomplished because the vine secretes an acid, and then sucks the liquefied creature inside. To avoid being captured by one of these plants, simply look for its telltale gold leaves. If captured, a wizard's only hope lies in being able to reach his or her wand to perform the Incendio charm. However, since generally the wand is inaccessible, 9 of 10 wizards trapped by the snare-tree die._

"Lovely," Ginny said. "And Cupid just happened to forget to mention this."

Dumbledore stood up, presumably to give the morning pep-talk and present the food. All the students followed suit.

"Now, students, as you all know, we recently had our midterms and…" Dumbledore stopped, and a faint wrinkle appeared between his eyes. It became apparent that Draco Malfoy was shouting something to him.

"Yes, Draco?" Dumbledore queried.

Draco shouted again. "I would like to make an announcement, sir!"

"Well, by all means, proceed!" Dumbledore replied good-naturedly.

Malfoy quickly walked up to the stage and stood behind the podium, apparently waited for something to happen. And happen it did. Suddenly the lights went off. Frightened students began murmuring amongst themselves, and one particularly high-strung Hufflepuff screamed. Their anxiety soon subsided, though, for as abruptly as the lights had gone, they returned.

But the Great Hall was not left unchanged. All the tables and benches had disappeared and there were colored lights sweeping all around, like at wizarding concerts. Most shocking of all, though, was Malfoy. A glittering disco ball twirled lazily above his head, and Malfoy himself wore a crazy looking shiny disco outfit. (A/N – Can you see where I'm going with this, Solana?)

Strands of music seeped from the walls, and Malfoy opened his mouth and began to sing.

Yeah, there was a funky singer  
Playin' in a Rock & Roll Band  
And never had no problems yeah  
Burnin' down one night stands  
And everything around me, yeah  
Got to stop to feelin' so low  
And I decided quickly, Yes I did  
To disco down and check out the show

By this point, Malfoy was discoing in a manner that proved contagious. Some of the other students rose to their feet joining him and singing.

Yeah they was  
Dancin' and singin' and movin' to the groovin'  
And just when it hit me somebody turned around and shouted  
Play that funky music white boy  
Play that funky music right  
Play that funky music white boy  
Lay down that boogie and play that funky music till you die  
Till you die, oh till you die

Malfoy continued to sing and dance, but the other student were no longer as interested in his performance. Unwillingly they, too, found themselves either singing or dancing or both. Dumbledore was dressed up like a ballerina – complete with a pink fluffy tutu and glittery leotard. His beard had even been braided with lacy pink bows interspersed within it. As he danced across the stage, he slammed into Hagrid, who was dressed as a caveman and singing the Flintstones' theme song.

Professor Snape, as Elvis (Ginny wasn't surprised – after all, he had the perfect hair for it) was singing "You Ain't Nothin' but a Hound Dog," in an off pitch voice while furiously gyrating his hips. Standing beside him was Professor McGonagall in an indescribable outfit. Let's just say that women the professor's age aren't meant to be dressed like Brittany Spears.

In the middle of the dance floor a few house elves were break dancing. Winky managed to incorporate her weeping into her dancing, and beside her Dobby was spinning on his head.

Shy Hannah Abbot was dancing WAY too close to Blaise Zabini while wearing a very revealing outfit, and Hermione was singing "Sixteen Going on Seventeen" from _The Sound of Music_,accompanied by Ron.

Suddenly, Ginny found her legs couldn't support her anymore, and fell to the ground. She expected to hear the loud "crack!" of her head hitting the hard stone floor, but instead heard a soft thump. She raised herself up and looked around, only to find herself on a miniature beach surrounded by forks.

Dreading where this was going, she looked down at her legs, only to find that a shiny green tail had replaced them. Ginny felt the cool air on her skin – no surprise since she was clothed in nothing more than two large seashells. She started to blush hotly, but didn't have much time to be embarrassed, as she began to sing in a sweet soprano.

Look at this stuff  
Isn't it neat?  
Wouldn't you think my collection's complete?  
Wouldn't you think I'm the girl  
The girl who has

Everything?  
Look at this trove  
Treasures untold  
How many wonders can one cavern hold?  
Lookin' around here you'd think  
Sure - she's got everything

Thankfully, the music (and the spell) ground to a halt before Ginny had to go on to the next verse. Students everywhere stood in various strange poses in a state of bewilderment. Hermione was actually in the midst of kissing Ron when the chaos stopped, but she had continued in spite of it. Hannah quickly stepped away from Blaise, hands pressed to her blushing cheeks in horror at what she had done.

Ginny climbed to her feet shakily, and sat down on one of the newly returned benches.

"Students, this is no cause for alarm, I assure you," Dumbledore said, regaining his composure quickly now that he was clothed once more in his robes. "We will find the perpetrator of this hex, and bring them to justice. In the meanwhile, I doubt that these strange happenings are going to stop, but those that do occur I want you to ignore. No teasing the unfortunate victims…just going on with your normal activities. Until this is solved, however, there shall be no classes. Instead, each student shall remain in their dormitories in the care of their head of house, and various other professors. If something should happen, Madam Pomfrey is always available."

"No she's not!" Professor Flitwick interrupted. "We were going to inform you after breakfast Albus. Madam Pomfrey is…well, I don't know quite how to say this, but she's a whale right now," he sputtered.

"Oh…I see," said Professor Dumbledore, thinking fast. "In that case, the professors shall do their best to make you comfortable. Now, I want everyone to return to their dormitories at once."

"This way!" Percy cried shakily, wiping a bit of pink lipstick off his face. "This way please, follow me now." The other Head Boys and Girls took up the call, and slowly, jerkily, the students filed out of the Great Hall. Ginny stayed behind, gathering up her things.

A hand tapped her on the shoulder, making Ginny nearly drop her books. It was Malfoy, looking very pale.

"Look Weasley, I…" he said, trailing off

"Oh, it's just you Malfoy. So, do you believe me now?" Ginny asked smugly.

"I suppose so," Malfoy admitted, albeit reluctantly. "And I guess I'm going to have to help you."

"Oh good!" Ginny exclaimed.

"But only because my reputation can't stand another incident like that," Malfoy said quickly.

"Of course. Heaven forbid that you actually do something good without an ulterior motive," Ginny said sarcastically. "Look, go into Snape's private storage room and see if he has any of those ingredients. Meet me in the Room of Requirement at 10 o'clock and bring your broom. I'll be waiting for you. Oh, and I'd recommend that you wear some sturdy muggle clothes. Where we're going we'll need them."

"Where's the Room of Requirement?" Malfoy asked.

"Second floor, three doors to the right of Transfiguration," Ginny replied. "And don't be late."

Okay, I know I said the disclaimer applied to all chapters, but I'm gonna add to it. I don't own Play that Funky Music or Part of Your World either. I have been looking forward to this chapter forever now, and I hope it actually turned out well. I REALLY REALLY tried hard to make it go more slowly and smoothly, and I hope I succeeded in that. I also had a hard time getting this chapter written between EVIL Microsoft Word and visiting relatives. This chapter was 10 whole pages long! I guess that's because I went slower. Anyway, thanks to all my reviewers, you really make my day! Oh, and I promised my little sister I'd say this, so here goes. She believes that if a dementor drank a Chantico (an extremely rich hot chocolate from Starbucks that tastes like pure melted chocolate), he would go away skipping and sugar-high. From my experience, that theory just might be accurate. Anyway, here goes the age-old plea. PLEASE REVIEW!

PS. My Sister rules

PPS. Sister typed that

Yeah, I know my sister typed that. I let her read the chapter (as she's a big fanfiction reader) and then when I came back, I found that on the story. There's always an ulterior motive!


	5. Chapter 5

"Hey Malfoy, I'm here!" Ginny cried, throwing open the door to the Room of Requirement. She whistled softly under her breath as she looked about the room that was made to reflect the occupant's preferences. For a Malfoy, he certainly had good taste, even if it was a bit, well…Malfoyish.

A long dark table with scrolled legs dominated the marble room and two throne-like chairs sat at either end. Large windows swathed in green velvet draperies looked out onto a grassy Quidditch field. Malfoy himself sat perched on a windowsill, dressed in a dressy green shirt lined with silver thread and black pants, both of which were made by famous designers and fit him like a second skin.

"About time you got here," Draco muttered, eyes on the Quidditch players outside.

"I thought I said to wear sturdy clothes, Malfoy," Ginny said, stepping into the room and letting the Invisibility cloak crumple on the ground. She leaned her battered Cleansweep 47 against the wall, only to have it fall to the floor with a clatter as soon as she let go of it.

"You did. And I wore them," Draco replied, turning around to face her. "Hey! What happened to my nice room!"

"I thought it needed redecorating," Ginny replied smugly. When she'd stepped inside, the room had compromised between what she and Draco wanted. As a result, everything was slightly changed. The marble had been turned into to a dark teak wood. The table had taken on an oval shape and its stain had faded several shades. The chairs had dropped their throne-like appearance, instead opting for something more comfortable. And the Quidditch game going on outside had changed from the Wasps verses the Leprechauns to the Hornets versus the Cannons.

"Figures. Leave it to a Weasley to take something perfect and ruin it."

"Ah, but perfection is in the mind of the beholder. Anyway, Malfoy, about those "sturdy" clothes of yours. You could get those dirty, ripped, and incinerated, and not be worried in the least?" she asked skeptically.

"Yes, because I can afford not to care. If I wanted to I could always buy new clothes. Unlike you, it seems," Malfoy said.

Ginny blushed, looking down at her outfit. It was true that she'd had her purple t-shirt since she was 12, three years ago now. Her jeans were only a year old, and pockmarked with grass stains that even the strongest of spell could not get out.

"And your face, Weasley…it's hideous! At the very least you could have worn some nice clothes in an attempt to disguise your ugliness," Malfoy said.

"Hey, my face looks just fine!" Ginny protested.

"Go ahead and tell yourself that if it makes you feel better. But you're not going to be wearing those rags if I'm going to have to see you in them. You know," said Malfoy, pausing for effect,"I think I ought to remedy that. Room of Requirement, get some new clothes for Weasley to wear." At once the requested clothes appeared at his feet.

"I'm not going to wear those clothes!" Ginny said indignantly.

"Fine. Then don't wear anything at all!"

"Oh…" Ginny said, listening to the nagging little voice in the back of her head telling her that she really did need new clothes. "All right. It's not that big of a deal, anyway. But, there are conditions, Malfoy. What I wear cannot be revealing, and it has to be relatively warm. Got it?" she asked.

"Are you sure you wouldn't be warm in this!" Draco asked mockingly, holding up the sparkly blue top with the swooping neckline and the extremely short silver skirt that the room had originally delivered. She just glared.

"All right, all right. Well, you heard her, room. Something warm, durable, and not revealing."

"And a place for me to change!" Ginny added quickly.

Red drapes emerged to cover a corner of the room, and she slipped behind them.

"So, where'd you get your invisibility cloak, Weasley?" Draco asked as Ginny changed clothes. "Since it would beggar your family to so much look at, much less buy an invisibility cloak, I know it can't be yours."

"I didn't steal it, if that's what you're implying," she said, ignoring the barb about her family. "I just borrowed it from Harry."

"And by borrowed it, you mean took it without asking him, right?" Draco said, correctly reading between the lines.

"I left a note! Besides, Ron borrows it all the time…so why shouldn't I? It's for his own good, anyways," Ginny said, trying not to feel guilty.

"Oh, so Miss. Goody-two-shoes Gryffindor has some Slytherin in her after all!" Draco exclaimed, delighted.

"Did you know you're impossible!" she asked.

"So they tell me," he said smugly.

"You're notconceited or anything are you?" Ginny asked dryly.

"Of course not!" Draco said, acting hurt. "Conceit is a fault, and I have no faults. Therefore, I am not conceited."

"But saying that you have no faults means that you are conceited," she replied, perplexed.

"Ah, but I could just be telling the truth," Draco corrected.

"Okay, then I'll name a fault. You're mean as a snake."

"Why, thank you. I am in Slytherin for a reason, after all. But I'm afraid that proving I'm conceited is a bit more difficult than that. You just might be reflecting one of your own faults, like lying or bias. Either way."

A stunned silence fell as Ginny struggled to find a way to prove Draco's conceit.

"It's all right, Ginny. I wouldn't want you to hurt your brain, now would I?" Draco said mockingly.

"Oh, shut up! You know, you're almost as bad as Hermione."

"Correction, my dear. I'm worse."

"Did you just call me, 'my dear'?" Ginny asked. "Of all the things I never thought a Malfoy would say, that ranks pretty high on the list!"

"I shouldn't have expected you to understand. It added to the dialog! No, no, that's not what I meant. Ugh…it's hard to explain. Just trust me, I did not mean it the way that your little mind interpreted it. I guess that says something about your mind, though," Draco said smoothly, trying to divert her mind away from his blunder. The best defense is always a good offense, as his father had so often drilled into his mind.

Ginny chose to ignore his last jibe, and stepped out of the make-shift dressing room wearing a burgundy turtleneck and brown corduroy pants. She had also exchanged her sneakers for brown sturdy boots and pulled her hair back into a high ponytail.

"There now, Weasley. That wasn't so hard, was it?" Draco asked. Personally, he thought she looked quite nice, even though he still would have preferred the first outfit. "I fail to see how that's durable, though."

"They're stain resistant, wrinkle resistant, and won't tear," Ginny said, holding up a label that apparently came with the clothing. "If that doesn't qualify as sturdy, I don't know what does."

"Ah, but is it fire resistant? You did mention that it could be incinerated."

Ginny just glared, something that she would probably become quite good at if she had to spend much more time with Malfoy.

"Okay, Weasley. Tell me, already. Where are we going?" Malfoy asked, abruptly changing the subject. "You asked me to wear sturdy clothing, and you don't need that if you're just going to wander about the castle."

"I'll tell you later…I'm notquite sure myself yet. Almost, but not quite."

"Yeah, right." said Malfoy. "Well, if you won't tell me where we're going, at least tell me how long we will be gone."

"That depends on how you did raiding Snape's potions ingredients," Ginny replied.

"You couldn't just give me a straight answer, could you?" Malfoy said, slightly aggravated. "Actually the raid itself went flawlessly. I just told Snape that I had a project I needed some potions ingredients for, and he agreed to let me get some. But, I only found the burping berries in his ingredients."

"Great," Ginny said dejectedly. "Well, I hadn't really expected you to find anything else, but it definitely makes life more difficult."

"So, now will you tell me?" Malfoy asked impatiently.

"Okay. We'll be gone probably, oh… three to five days."

"What!" Draco demanded. "Where are we going, anyways! And no more sidestepping the question, Weasley. You tell me right now, or I'm not going one step outside this castle with you!"

"Fine, Malfoy," Ginny said wearily. "But you're not gonna like it. The only place I can think of to go is the Forbidden Forest."

"The Forbidden Forest! What! Of all the hare-brained stupid ideas I've ever heard, that is the worst. Anyone in their right mind knows that going to the forest is suicidal!"

"Well, unless you happen to know of some other place nearby that we could get giant drool, unicorn hair, snare tree leaves, and phoenix ashes, that's where we're gonna have to go!"

When her statement was greeted with nothing but silence (although Draco was still furiously searching his brain for an alternative), Ginny knew that she had won this round.

"I take it that you can't find any, either. Unless you want to wind up embarrassing yourself and ruining your reputation in front of the entire school, I suggest you accompany me."

Ginny's line struck home, as she had intended. Draco still searched desperately for a way out of it, though.

"Why me of all people! Why not Potter or some other stupid Gryffindor?"

"Because (a) Cupid chose you, (b) Harry couldn't brew a decent potion to save his life, and (c) he would also blab about where we were going and what we were doing to the entire rest of the Gryffindor tower. He's nice, but he has his weaknesses just like everyone else does."

"Oh…all right, Weasley. You win," Draco said grudgingly.

"Good!" Ginny exclaimed happily. "Now, as soon as I get a snack, we'll be out of here."

"Wait a second," said Malfoy, finding a way that he could get the littlest Weasley back. "You know, you were right all along. I really do need some more durable clothes. I'll be right back." He mumbled something under his breath, presumably a request for clothing, and ducked into the changing room that had reappeared.

"Why is it that I don't quite believe him?" Ginny said to herself. Louder, she called, "What are you up to now, Malfoy?"

"None of your business, Weasley. You'll see soon enough, anyway. Now go and get your snack."

Shaking her head at Malfoy's attitude, but knowing there was absolutely nothing she could do about it, Ginny seated herself at the head of the table.

"Room of Requirement, I would like some chocolate."

A crystal platter piled high with chocolates appeared in front of her. The platter contained every chocolate imaginable – white chocolate, dark chocolate, milk chocolate, chocolate with nuts, chocolate covered cherries…it had them all. Each gave off a mouth-watering aroma. Smiling happily, she plucked a random chocolate from the dazzling array and plopped it into her mouth.

Draco, hearing her contented sigh, poked his head out from the curtains.

"A bit of a chocoholic, aren't we Weasley," he said dryly. "How do you stay so thin if you eat like this, anyway?"

"Genetics," Ginny said happily while choosing another chocolate.

Malfoy pulled his head back behind the curtains again and pulled on his shirt. He looked at his reflection in a mirror on the wall and smirked. He couldn't wait to see the look on Weasley's face when she saw this outfit. No girl could resist his charms, and he was quite certain that this one would be no different. Unable to wait any longer, he stepped out from behind the curtains.

"So, what do you think, Weasley? You asked for something durable, and if this isn't durable, I don't know what is." Malfoy said, showing off his black leather outfit and matching black boots.

Ginny took one look at Draco and started laughing. Her laughter swiftly turned into stifled giggles due to a fierce glare from Draco.

"What?" he demanded irritably. Laughter was certainly not the reaction he had been looking for. "What's so funny!"

"Well…it certainly is durable! It's just…" here she dissolved into giggles again, "it's just that you look like a character from a muggle movie named Matrix. Hermione brought it over to our house for us to watch once. The resemblance is just too funny!"

"I, for one, fail to see the humor in this," Draco said huffily.

"Trust me," she explained," If you saw the movie, you'd know what I was talking about. All you need is some dark glasses and a gun, and you would fit right into that movie!" She started giggling again.

Malfoy saw a way that he could take advantage of Ginny's distraction. He snuck over to the table, and had just grabbed a chocolate when his hand was swatted away. Ginny crossed her arms across her chest, standing between him and the rest of the chocolates.

"No one gets between me and my chocolates," she said. "Now, hand over the chocolate, and nobody gets hurt."

Malfoy licked it, and then released the chocolate into Ginny's outstretched hand. She dropped it as if it were on fire.

"Ewww!" she squealed. "Malfoy! Yuck!"

"So, Weasley, are you willing to share them now?" Draco asked pointedly.

"If I must," Ginny replied, with the air of a martyred saint.

"So," Malfoy said casually, gathering a handful of chocolates from the platter. "What's your brilliant plan for getting out of the castle?"

"This," Ginny said, pulling a piece of crumpled parchment out of her pocket and holding it up.

"But…it's blank!"

"Great observation skills, Malfoy," Ginny said dryly. "It is blank. For now." She bent over it and muttered something, tapping her wand three times in the middle. Immediately writing began to appear on the page. Draco leaned over Ginny's shoulder to read the flowery script.

_Mister Padfoot would like to request that the blindingly blonde intruder keep his prying eyes where they belong._

_Mister Prongs would concur with Mister Padfoot, and would also like to suggest that the interloper get a **real** tan…the fake one he currently has is a mockery._

_Mister Moony seeks to inquire as to whether this is Ginevra's choice for a boyfriend. He hopes that she has better choice in men than this juvenile._

"Oh, you guys!" Ginny said, giggling both at the Marauders and at the horror-struck look on Draco's face. "Don't worry, he's anything but a boyfriend. Now could you please show me the map?"

"What was that all about? Who were those people? And how did that "Mister Prongs" know that this tan was fake! I spend a lot of time and money on this tan…and that spell is top-quality, too!"

"It sure doesn't look like it," Ginny said, cracking a smile. "If you must know, this is another one of Harry's possessions. It's a map that shows a bunch of secret exits from the castle. But, there's a spell on it, so that if you try to blab about this to anyone, to steal it, or use one the exits without one of Harry's friends, you'll start spouting nursery rhymes and be rooted to the ground."

Malfoy studied her carefully, trying to figure out if she was lying or not.

"I don't believe you," he said, testing her.

"Try me," she said, looking straight into his eyes.

Draco reached to take it, and then stopped. Was that a quiver of a smile playing about her lips? He pulled his hand back slowly.

"I believe you."

"Then believe me on this, too," Ginny said. "If we don't get going soon, we're not gonna get a camp set up before dark. Room of Requirement, I need supplies for a five-day trip."

"And make them light!" Draco added. A thump on the table signaled their arrival.

"Light?" Ginny asked, mildly surprised. "Why not use Wigardium Leviosa?"

"Because, Weasley, the creatures in the forest are attracted to spells. Unless you want a werewolf biting you, I'd suggest you not use any of them."

"Good point."

"I know…it was mine after all. Now, which exit would you suggest taking? Ogden the Obese, or Barnabas the Barmy?" Draco asked.

"Definitely Barnabas the Barmy," Ginny said, tracing the jagged line on the map. "Even though the passageway is a bit barmy itself, it's worth it because it comes out by the Whomping Willow, where no one will see us leave."

"All right, let's go. I'll take the map and my broom, and you can take the packs and your broom."

"Uh, I don't think so!" Ginny cried indignantly. "Ever heard of something called sharing?"

"No. Now grab the packs, and let's go." Draco said.

"Well, you're gonna have to learn fast," she said, tossing him a bag of supplies. "Now get under the cloak."

Draco, grumbling about Weasleys who didn't know their place, obeyed. Ginny kicked open the door, looking down the hallway.

"Coast is clear," she whispered. They walked swiftly and silently, Ginny leading the way. It seemed that someone had to catch them, and they couldn't possibly get away with this…but no one came. When they'd safely reached the statue, she reached up on her tiptoes to scratch its right armpit.

"Yuck," Malfoy said. "What're you doing that for?"

"You'll see," Ginny said, as the back of the statue opened with a clang revealing a tunnel inside.

"Hurry up Malfoy!" she hissed urgently, climbing into the tunnel and gesturing for him to follow. Draco pushed his bag of supplies and broom in first and then pulled himself inside, shutting the door behind him.

"Lumos," he muttered, looking around for Ginny.

"Weasley?" he called. "Where are you?"

There was no reply.

Draco crawled around a little, hunting for his guide out of this dark, dank tunnel. Suddenly his head hit the ceiling.

"Ouch," Draco said inaudibly, clasping his hand to his aching head. He pointed his wand at the tunnel, illuminating it. It appeared to suddenly get a lot smaller, with only room for one person…one person a heck of a lot smaller than he was. Frustrated now, he pushed his things ahead, hearing them slide.

Draco got down on his belly and wedged his body through the tunnel, wriggling to move himself forward.

Suddenly he felt the tunnel open up, and then he was sliding down the tunnel at breakneck speeds, wind whipping by! Draco couldn't help himself. He screamed like a baby.

A speck of light in the distance got bigger and bigger and bigger until it revealed itself to be a tiny room. He slid into it, bowling Ginny over and only stopping when she hit the wall.

"Jesus, Malfoy!" Ginny yelled. "Didn't you ever hear of not murdering your guide!"

"Didn't you ever hear of warning someone?" Malfoy retorted.

"Well, I did say it was a barmy passageway," she said, smirking slightly.

"Very funny. In the future, a warning would be nice."

"Sure, Malfoy. Now could you get off me? This isn't the world's most comfortable position."

Draco climbed off of her quickly, blushing slightly. Ginny just remained sitting on the ground, waiting for something.

"Well? Aren't you going to offer me a hand up!" she demanded.

"Ummm…no. Hadn't planned on it," Malfoy said, walking away.

Ginny growled under her breath and then pulled herself off the ground – wincing, Draco noted slightly guiltily. But he pushed that thought from his mind, and instead asked a question that he'd been wondering about for quite some time now.

"How are we going to get to the forest anyway?" he asked. "It's too far to walk…not easily at least."

Ginny looked at him strangely. "What did you think the broom was for?"

"Ummm…" Draco said sheepishly, eyeing his broom.

"Never mind. It's getting late, and we'd better get going. Come on."

She climbed up a rickety wooden ladder, and Draco followed at her heels. When they came out they were about fifteen feet away from the Whomping Willow…a safe distance, but far too close for Draco's liking. Ginny kicked a rock back in place to cover the secret passageway.

"All right," she said. "Rope the supplies to your back, and we'll fly to the center of the forest. We could get all the materials by just going to different parts of the forest, but the center is where we're likeliest to find everything at once. This lessens the time we're in the forest, and, therefore, the likelihood of us getting killed. Try to stick close to me, okay?"

Draco complied (something he seemed to be doing an awful lot of these days) and mounted up.

"Ready?" Ginny asked. Draco nodded. They pushed off the ground simultaneously.

Ginny smiled. Flying was the most natural thing to her, almost like breathing. It made her feel relaxed and happy…something she needed after dealing with an arrogant Slytherin like Malfoy. Although, he hadn't been that bad so far. In fact, for Malfoy this was almost cordial. Her thoughts were shattered when Mafoy himself pulled alongside her.

"Race!" he yelled over the wind.

"You're on!" she shouted, speeding up. Malfoy easily caught up and passed her.

"No fair!" Ginny called plaintively. "You have a better broom!"

Draco smirked. She was right. He owned the broom that every Quidditch player would love to own – the Swiftmover 3000. Even Potter's broom couldn't come close to matching the Swiftmover for speed.

"Why don't we switch brooms?" Malfoy offered. "Then I'll still beat you, and you'll see how superior my flying skills are."

Ginny pondered on this. She didn't want to admit it, but she certainly couldn't beat Malfoy while he was on the Swiftmover. And she would love to try out that broom. She eyed it enviously, and then made up her mind.

"I'll take you up on that, Malfoy."

"Good," Draco said, slthrilled at the chance to beat Weasley. "Get closer to my broom, and we'll switch in the air."

"What!" Ginny cried, astonished. "Are you crazy?"

"I do it all the time, but if you're scared, Weasley, you don't have to go through with it."

Ginny shrugged. She'd grown up with brothers and taken bigger risks before.

"All right," she said, moving closer.

"Now on the count of three I want you to jump across."

Ginny crouched on her broom, balancing carefully.

"One…two….THREE! Jump, Weasley!"

She jumped and covered the gap, hands grabbing on to the broom like they would never let go. Draco stood up on his broom, and Ginny moved to the back of the broom to make room for him.

"All right, now I'll switch brooms. One…two…" But before he could make it to three he lost his balance and fell, plummeting towards the forest far below

"Malfoy!" Ginny shrieked, looking for him frantically. She found him, a pinprick above the vast forest. Ginny went into a steep dive, relying on her Seeker instincts to guide her (remnant from when she had substituted for Harry).

She drew closer and closer, taking the Swiftmover's speed to its very limit. Malfoy was just above the crowns of the trees now…if she was going to save him it'd have to be now. Ginny swooped down beside him and scooped him out of the air. She tried desperately to pull out of the dive, but they were far too close to the trees to do so. The two crashed into the forest at a break-neck speed.

The last thing she remembered thinking was that Draco would kill her for breaking his broom.

* * *

The chapter is done! FINALLY! I have had that last scene in my head for a FOREVER now, and it feels soooooooo good to get it on paper! I'm not really thrilled with this chapter, as it still feels off, but less so than the other chapters. The last part was kind of forced, so if it seems off, that's the reason why. I've got the vague idea for the next chapter, and know roughly the scenes I'll use, but I don't have any order or anything in between, so it might take a while to write. Thanks for reviewing – it's nice to know that someone's actually reading this. 


	6. Chapter 6

"Ow," Draco moaned as he woke up.

"Ow," Draco moaned again when no one answered him. He had a throbbing headache and felt like somebody had hit him with a thousand bludgers.

"Oh, stop being such a wimp!" someone said irritably from beside him. Someone who sounded very familiar…

"Weasley?" Draco asked, opening his eyes and then shutting them again when he saw nothing but trees. "Is this a nightmare?"

Ginny laughed. "Yes, it's me," she said. "Who else?" she asked, getting up from a log. She was covered in bandages, having already dealt with her own injuries.

"You look like a mummy," Draco commented as Ginny crouched by his side.

"Very funny, Malfoy," Ginny said. "Now I need you to sit up so I can heal you, too."

"But I don't want to be a mummy!" Draco pouted.

"Tough luck. Now do it!" she said.

"But it hurts!" he whined.

"It needs to be done," she replied. "Now, can you sit up on your own, or am I going to have to help you?"

"On my own," he said, resigned. He pushed himself up gently, ignoring the pain. After all, he couldn't let a girl show him up.

Ginny helped him to lean again a tree trunk, and then eyed him appraisingly, mentally ticking off all the injuries Draco had.

"You've got a bunch of lacerations and a really nasty gash on the back of your head, but other than that, you seem fine. Thankfully your broom has cushioning charms on it, so the fall wasn't nearly as bad as it could have been. We got pretty lucky – had we been using my broom we'd be dead. With yours the injuries are relatively minor."

"You call this minor!" he asked incredulously.

"In comparison to having your neck broken, then, yes!" Ginny exclaimed. "Now shut up so I can heal you. Lean forward so I can take care of your head." she said, pulling some gauze and a some foul-smelling concoctions out of the first aid kit. "Now hold still," Ginny commanded. "This is going to sting a bit, but the pain should recede afterwards because the cream has a healing and pain relieving potion in it. You'll feel a little sore tomorrow, but that's all."

The "little sting" actually felt like fire, but Draco just gritted his teeth.

"Good," Ginny said, slightly surprised that he hadn't complained. She applied another ointment to the bandage and held it on his head.

"Now hold this on for me," she said, pressing his uninjured hand against the bandage. "Good," she said, beginning to wind the gauze about his head. "You can take your hand off now," Ginny said, knotting the bandage firmly.

"Where did you learn all of this, Weasley?" Draco asked.

"Training to be an Auror," she responded, rummaging through the first aid kit for more bandages. "On top of taking all the Defense classes, you also have to be a fully trained healer. And the healer's course requires that you learn muggle healing techniques. It's actually quite remarkable how muggles heal without magic."

"You would say that," he said, smirking, but not unkindly.

"I guess it does run in the family, doesn't it?" she replied, smiling. "But, really, muggles have done some fantastic things. Take the pyramids, for example. Built entirely without magic!"

"Wrong as usual, Weasley," Draco said. "They've discovered ancient magical residue on them."  
"Yes, but the residue was probably applied when the early wizarding tribes used them as huge fortresses. They used to house their entire families in them – like a huge castle, "Ginny said, applying bandages all the while.

"That's fascinating, Weasley," Draco said, "but shouldn't you be concentrating on what you're doing? You're bandaging invisible cuts."

"Huh?" Ginny asked, then trailed off, blushing. "Oops. Sorry about that. I get really engrossed in things sometimes."

"That's all right. I was actually learning things for once. Professor Binns always puts me straight to sleep."

"The same here. I just copy Luna's notes, though, and I manage just fine." Ginny said, dressing his leg.

"Now, this potion is for bone regrowth, just in case I missed something," she said, explaining things as she went along. "I want you to drink the whole thing, okay?"

Draco gulped visibly. Pomfrey had forced the very same thing down his throat when he'd broken his arm before. To say it was an unpleasant experience would be a major understatement.

"Oh, no," he said vehemently. "There is no way in hell that you're getting me to drink that thing!"

"I can think of several ways of getting you to drink it, none of them pleasant. Now, either you can drink it, or I can force you to. You choose."

Draco sized her up,evaluatingher strength.

"No," he said.

"Fine," Ginny said, grabbing the bottle. "Your choice. But don't say I didn't warn you." She sprang into action, grabbing his hand and twisting. Hard.

"Ow, ow, ow!" Draco said. "I'll drink it! I'll drink it! Just stop!"

Ginny eyed him, and then slowly released him. Gasping, Draco massaged his wrist.

"Now drink," she said firmly.

Eyeing the bottle's contents distastefully, Draco downed the loathsome potion. Amazingly he didn't throw it up, although he did gag once or twice.

"Good," Ginny said, satisfied.

"Ugh," Draco moaned, clutching his now tumultuous stomach.

"You'll feel better soon," she said.

"What sort of doctor are you? Injuring your patient! And where'd you learn to do that?"

"Growing up with brothers will do that to you," Ginny replied, packing up the first aid kit.

"Weasley?" Draco ventured after a moment's pause. "Could you teach me to do that?"

"Of course," she replied. "Here let me show you," she said, reaching for his wrist.

"No way!" he exclaimed, snatching his hand away. "Not after last time!"

"Fine," Ginny said. "I'll show you myself, then. My brother Bill taught this to me in my second year when I wanted help with self defense. It's a pretty basic technique – you just have to do it over and over again until you learn it by heart. Anyways, you take your opponent's hand," she said, demonstrating, "and put your four fingers on the palm directly underneath their thumb. Your own thumb presses right in between the knuckles of the ring and pinky fingers. Then you just pull your fingers back and press your thumb forward, twisting their hand. If you crank it hard enough then they should wind up on the ground. Obviously when I did it I didn't put enough force into it to seriously damage you – just enough to make you want to cooperate."

"Wow," Draco said. "That's a really neat move."

"Yeah. But you better hope they don't have a wand with them, otherwise…" she said, trailing off to illustrate her meaning.

"Good point," he conceded.

"I know," she said, smirking slightly. "It was mine."

"Please don't do that," Draco said, wincing.

"Do what?" she questioned, confused.

"Act like that! It's disconcerting. You were smirking, and…and…acting like me!"

"So?" Ginny asked. "Is there some law that says no Gryffindor is allowed to smirk? Or be conceited? Because, if so, we're all in trouble. Especially Ron – I swear he acts so arrogant sometimes. He thinks he always knows what's best, and he thinks he can boss me around. Well, he can't! Just because I'm a year younger and a girl doesn't mean I can't take care of myself!" she exclaimed.

"Bravo, Weasley," Draco said, applauding her mockingly. "Now, after that heartwarming show of independence, let's get back to the matters at hand. Not that I don't wholeheartedly agree with you – Weasley is thick – but might I remind you that we just fell a hundred feet, plowed through trees, and are sitting in the middle of a forest full of creatures that want to kill us," Draco said.

"Oh, yeah," Ginny said forlornly, once more reminded of their situation. A silence descended on the camp. "Well, I suppose you want to know what happened to your broom."

"No – I can guess for myself. It's broken."

"Yes," she confirmed.

"And we're stranded."

"If you put it that way, yes," Ginny replied.

"Great. So what's the plan for getting us out of this place?" Draco asked.

"Well…" Ginny said, uncertainly. "I hadn't thought that far yet. Maybe Cupid will help us?" she ventured.

"And the chances of that happening are…" Draco said.

"About one in a million," Ginny finished.

"Do you, by some miracle, have a back-up plan?" Draco asked.

Ginny just shook her head.

"Isn't that just typical of a Gryffindor? You charge in heroically, ready to save the day, but don't actually have a plan," Draco said disgustedly.

"I did too have a plan!" she said, defending herself. "We were going to fly back to the castle, except you went and got the brilliant idea to switch brooms!"

"Well, who agreed!" Draco fired back, slightly irked that she was right. "You should always have a Plan B, because 9 times out of 10, Plan A will fall through!"

Silence settled on the camp once more, but now it was charged with tension. This time it was Draco who broke it.

"Do you at least have a map?" he asked.

"No," Ginny replied. "But that's not my fault. Maps don't work on this forest because it's constantly shifting. One week it'll look like one thing, and the next it will have totally changed."

"Wonderful," Draco sighed. "Well, it was worth a try."

"So I guess we'll just have to wait for someone to help us, and get the ingredients in the meantime," Ginny said.

"Wait for someone to help us?" Draco echoed, his previous anger returning. "Who? Your precious Dumbledore! He's probably still thinks he's a ballerina! Are the chances of him coming to our rescue worth sitting around in a dangerous forest waiting for him!"

A low chuckle filled the clearing, gradually getting louder.

Slowly, the two turned around. A man lounged against the tree, dressed in plain Roman clothing. He had brown hair, mostly covered by a winged cap, and a tall muscular form. In his left hand he held a bag full of money, and in his right he held what appeared to be a wand except for the two white ribbons adorning it. He was, quite obviously, yet another god.

"Well said!" the god exclaimed.

"Who is that?" Ginny hissed, getting her wand out.

"Hermes," Draco whispered in awe. "God of –"

"Travelers, shepherds, orators, poets, athletes, inventors, interpreters, liars, and thieves. Guardian of roads and commerce. Messenger for the gods and bringer of luck and charm. Also know as Mercury and Alipes," Hermes interrupted, concluding Draco's sentence. "Though I doubt you were going to say all of that."

"What do you want?" Draco asked. "Surely you didn't come here just for a social visit."

"Actually, that happens more often than you might think. There was that time when Jupiter and I…oh, never mind. You were correct in assuming that I had a motive in coming. Your friend Cupid."

"Uh-oh," Ginny muttered. "We're sunk."

"He came to me a few days ago, pleading for help. Apparently something had gone wrong with one of his potions, and he was under the impression that I could fix it. Of course, he was correct. But, I refused to assist him. After all, there was nothing in it for me."

At this Draco pinched Ginny in hopes of keeping her from saying something stupid (as always). Unsurprisingly, he failed.

"Why not?" she demanded. "When someone needs help, your job as a god is to assist them."

"Ah, so the brave lion cub speaks," Hermes said mockingly. "Well, tell me, little girl, if one of your enemies asked you for help, would you give it to them?"

"Of course," Ginny replied. "Well, maybe. Depending on what they wanted," she amended.

"You see?" Hermes asked. "You would only assist them if it benefited yourself or your cause."

"But, back to the matters at hand," Draco said hastily before things could get nasty. "You were saying, Hermes? About the potion?"

"Yes, yes," Hermes said, brushing him away. "My, you are sharp. Just like your father." At this Ginny and – curiously enough – Draco winced.

"Back on topic," Hermes said. "Ultimately, Cupid and I made a bet. However, Cupid only accepted the wager on the terms that I help you a) find the potion ingredients, b) make the potion, and c) get back home. So, here I am."

"What was the bet?" Ginny said, voicing the very thought that Draco had just had.

"That, I'm afraid I cannot disclose. I will, however, inform you after it is completed, though I believe you will have figured it out by then."

"It involves us, then?" Even though Draco phrased this as a question, he stated it more as a fact.

"I can neither affirm nor deny anything you say, Mr. Malfoy, so why bother asking questions?"

"Great," said Draco, correctly interpreting that as a yes.

Hermes continued. "Unfortunately, you two have gotten yourself into such a predicament that I can't do much to help you. I can, however, give you a piece of advice. Seek the centaurs out. They'll help you find what you're looking for. But be careful around them. Especially you, Mr. Malfoy. You are no longer a child."

"Am I a child?" Ginny asked.

"You…you, Miss Weasley, are debatable," Hermes replied, looking her over thoughtfully.

"The best of luck to you both," he said, fading away. But before Hermes vanished completely Ginny thought she heard him say, "You'll be needing it."

* * *

"Well, it has begun," Hermes said regretfully to Cupid. "Although I'm not quite sure why I had to get involved. You could have delivered the message just as easily on your own." 

"I've told you a thousand times Hermes, you're much better at this sort of thing than I am," Cupid said, rolling over on the cloud he was perched upon. "You know that whenever I lie, or even try to cover up the truth, I stutter and blush and generally make it obvious that I'm lying. And we couldn't have that, now could we?"

"No, we could not," Hermes agreed thoughtfully. "You know…there was something that I forgot to mention to them that they might have found useful."

"And what might that be?" Cupid asked, sipping his ambrosia.

"I am also the god of match-making," Hermes said. "And that is why I shall win our bet."

"No way!" Cupid sputtered, nearly spilling his heavenly drink. "I am the god of LOVE, for Zeus's sake! And I say that the only place those two would ever get together is in your dreams."

"And I am the god of intelligent speech, and I say that you're spewing utter nonsense. Besides, match-making is entirely different from your version of love. Your love is rather chaotic. You think, 'Oh look! There's a pretty couple!' and shoot them full of arrows when, in fact, they clash horribly," Hermes said, evoking a scowl from Cupid.

"Your so-called "love" relies totally on hormones and lust," Hermes continued. "Mine is a truer, more realistic love; one that will last throughout all of life's ups and downs. It simply identifies two people that are perfect for one another and then just…encourages them a little, so to speak. And I will win because neither of us may interfere. Well, except for when we crashed their brooms," he amended.

"I still say you're wrong," Cupid replied sulkily. "I mean, their families have hated one another for generations! How are you going to overcome that!"

"True love conquers all," Hermes said, ending the discussion.

* * *

Okay, so what do ya'll think? Good? Or at least better? I hope it's better than the first few chapters! I am working on overhauling those, so hopefully they'll be better soon. I hope you're happy that I added Hermes and the wager to the plot. This chapter's shorter than the last one, only 11 pages. Please please please review! And thanks for sticking with me - I know I'm not the best author, but I really am working at it. 


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